Assassin!
by LavenderTown
Summary: International relations are pretty tense lately, and America thinks he's found the perfect way to let off some steam!


**A/N:** Hello there! This is my very first fanfic ever, so please bear with me as I figure out the mechanics of this site. I've been wanting to write a fun, suspenseful Hetalia fic for quite a while, and Arixabell's amazing Hetalia story The Strongest Nation finally prompted me into actually starting a story of my own. I'm pretty excited about it! So…yes, that's it for now.

Here you go!

* * *

**Part 1**

America burst through the double doors of his own conference room and smiled smugly, taking in the scowls from the other nations as he made his way to the head of his giant mahogany conference table.

He was completely pumped that Phase One of his top-secret, totally awesome plan had worked – almost all of the nations had come to the impromptu "emergency meeting" he had organized, even if they didn't look very happy about it. In fact, judging from the heated glares that were being tossed back and forth across the table, America figured that "happy" was pretty far down on the list of predominating emotions in the room. Something like "blood curdling rage" was far more likely topping the charts in that respect.

But that's exactly why he had called the meeting in the first place! To put it lightly, international relations had not been the best of late. If the last world conference was an indication of anything (with had ended with Italy crying, Germany screaming, Greece and Turkey throttling each other, and Switzerland pulling an M57 from freaking _who knows where_ and threatening to off the next nation that so much as blinked in Liechtenstein's direction), the nations were all very badly in need of a way to let out their pent-up frustration, and America was convinced he had figured out the perfect solution.

The superpower's grin broadened as his gaze settled on the distrustful scowl of one nation in particular. Emerald eyes narrowed threateningly beneath ridiculous caterpillar eyebrows, and America could just hear that snobby British voice in his head:

_I know you're up to something, git._

America laughed at the voice in his head. _Oh Iggy, just you freakin' wait!_ He supplied the older nation with a mischievous wink, and laughed again when England dropped his head to the table and groaned a disparaging "oh, bloody hell…" (out lout this time).

Well then, Phase One was officially complete. Now onto Phase Two! America cleared his throat loudly, silencing the bickering that had already begun.

"Alright everybody! Emergency meeting commencing_ now_!"

The superpower balked a bit as various expressions of fury around the table all zoomed to focus on him. "Heh heh, um…right. So, as you may have noticed, global relations lately have been kinda…strained…"

"On the edge of World War III, more like," Iceland muttered bitterly.

"Exactly!" America shouted and pointed, causing the young Nordic to flush. "So I, being the hero I am, started to think of ways for us to let out all our inner-rage and stuff without like, destroying the world or anything -"

"_Mein Gott_, are we here for some kind of group therapy session?" Prussia asked suspiciously, (why the heck was Prussia even_ there_ anyway?)

"No! Better than that!" America replied. "My fellow nations…" he began, his voice dripping with Hollywood dramatics, "I, the Hero, have gathered you here so that we may take part in one of the coolest social customs my country has to offer. We, my friends, are going to play the greatest, most epically freaking AWESOME game of Assassin IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF HISTORY!"

America threw back his head and pumped his fist in the air, completely caught up in the drama. The other nations were not so taken with the idea.

"Is that all this emergency meeting was about? A goddamn game?" Switzerland asked hotly.

"What is Assassin?" China wanted to know.

"~Ve, sounds scary!" North Italy cried.

"It's a live-action game that high school and college students play in my country as well," Canada explained, though no one was really paying attention. "You're assigned a target, and you have to find them and 'kill' them using water guns or some other kind of approved weapon…"

"And just how is this supposed to solve the world's problems?" Germany demanded.

"I can't believe you dragged us all here for this stupid shit, you hamburger bastard!" Romano growled.

"Oh_ Amerique_, I believe this your most foolish idea yet, _non_?" France remarked snidely.

"_Actually, I think it's quite a good idea."_

All heads slowly turned in shock toward the source of that last surprising comment. The most surprised nation was America himself - if there was one nation he was expecting to put up a struggle against his awesome idea, it was his stuffy, tea-sucking former guardian!

"Uhh…come again?" he asked, completely taken aback.

"You heard me, git," England answered, a small smirk curving up one corner of his lips, before addressing the other nations.

"I think America may be onto something here. The game is popular among students in the UK as well, and it does seem to help them let off some steam. I really don't see why it couldn't work just as well for us, and Merlin knows we'll be at each other's throats if we don't do something to relieve the tension that's built up over these past few months…"

The Briton's tone was calm and casual, but America couldn't help thinking that all this talk of "relieving tension" was sounding a bit… well, never mind. The important thing was that Iggy was actually defending one of his ideas, (which happened _never_!), and even more importantly, the younger nation could see that the logic behind England's argument was doing more to sway the other nations than he himself could have ever managed. He decided to run with it.

"See?" he exclaimed. "Even Igg- ahh, England agrees with me! This is the best idea ever!"

"Well," said Japan thoughtfully. "I suppose it could not hurt to try America-san's idea."

"I think it sounds fun!" chirped Taiwan.

"Would a battle axe be considered an approved weapon?" asked Denmark, (to which Norway responded with a pointed head-smack).

"How do you win?" asked Hungary, competitive fire already burning in her eyes. America grinned at the new surge of interest.

"Well, basically each time you make a 'kill', you acquire your victim's assigned target," he explained. "The last assassin or assassin team left is the winner! So… how 'bout it guys?"

America didn't even need an answer. Excited chatter picked up among the nations as the idea caught on, and it seemed resoundingly clear that Phase Two was yet another huge success!

_Pretty flippin' heroic_, if the superpower did say so himself.

* * *

England smiled, watching as the nations latched eagerly onto America's idea, (for the most part - Romano was still wearing his usual angry scowl). Normally, the Briton would have argued vehemently against_ any_ idea that hamburger-brained ex-colony of his suggested, but, as soon as the game had been mentioned, England felt a desire surface inside him that pushed him to come to the egotistical brat's defense:

He wanted to assassinate America.

The rather severe (and slightly unsettling) increase of the idiot's presence in England's thoughts over the past few months had nothing at all to do with it. He simply wanted to knock the American off that bloody high horse of his. Show him just what a real superpower (an Empire!) was made of! England could almost taste the sweet, sweet vengeance on his tongue already…

He was fully prepared to do whatever was necessary to ensure that he got his way.

**~(o)~**

* * *

**A/N:** If you're unfamiliar with the game Assassin, the Wikipedia entry offers a pretty concise explanation ;D

**Up next: rules are explained, and assassin teams are chosen (with… **_**unusual**_** results). Stay tuned!**


End file.
